Wednesday, February 28, 2007

‪י׳ אדר תשס״ז * 28 February 2007: Public Sleeping Day

Greetings.

Note: Again I reiterate, my MUSC E-mail account is scheduled to become invalid tomorrow. From now on, please only send E-mail to my GMail account.

Worthy cause of the day: “Al Gore - Tell Congress to act on global warming”.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is Lost in Translation. This site demonstrates the state of automatic translation technology by translating user-input text from English into various languages and back into English several times in a row. This site transformed “weird thing of the day” into “_ daily disowned of the thing”. Enjoy and share the disownedness.

Aaron

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

‪ט׳ אדר תשס״ז * 27 February 2007: International Polar Bear Day

Greetings.

Note: My MUSC E-mail address is scheduled to be disconnected Thursday morning. From now on, please send my E-mail only to my GMail address.

Relevant to today’s quasi-holiday: Wikipedia’s “Polar Bear” article.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is The Device Patented Process Indicating Apparatus. Keep in mind this is a USB device. Enjoy and share the weirdness.

Aaron

Monday, February 26, 2007

‪ח׳ אדר תשס״ז * 26 February: National Pistachio Day

Greetings.

Relevant to today’s quasi-holiday: The Wikipedia “Pistachio” article.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing, contributed by Erin, is “Plastic Jesus” by George Cromarty and Ed Rush. This song has inspired various dancing Jesuses, such as this cartoon, this graphic, and “The Jesus Dance”. There are also the imitations “Plastic Cthulhu” and “Plastic Vishnu”. Enjoy and share the weirdness.

Aaron

Friday, February 23, 2007

‪ה׳ אדר תשס״ז * 23 February 2007: National Dog Biscuit Day

Greetings.

Weird thing of the day character update: Robert “Bobby Awesome” Olsen is currently writing “I will not post to Aaron’s blog without permission” 100 times on paper as punishment for posting yesterday’s public service announcement. Anyone finding that hideous thing in their closet, please tell me; I’d like to know.

Worthy cause of the day: “Guide about computer recycling and reuse”.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is “Oops! You bwoke it.” Enjoy, share the weirdness, and Shabbath shalom.

Aaron
Hey yall

I was thinking that we need 2 b very responsible so i m putting a public service announcement thing on this blog todays public service announcement is this:

http://www.hitjokes.com/pics/Satire/The_More_You_Know_1.jpg

I hope we have all learned something

Keep it real!!!

Thursday, February 22, 2007

‪ד׳ אדר תשס״ז * 22 February 2007: The Wonderful Wizard of Oz (1910 movie)

Greetings.

Worthy thing of the day: Reality Check. (Very scary.)

Today’s news and commentary:Continuing with Oz video on-line, today’s weird thing is the 1910 movie The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. The material is unusually rearranged and abridged to make it fit in just 13 minutes. There are also other unusual variations on the story I will allow you to discover yourself. Enjoy and share the weirdness.

Aaron

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

‪ג׳ אדר תשס״ז * 21 February 2007: Ash Wednesday/International Mother Language Day

Greetings.

In celebration of today’s quasi-holiday, this post will be in my mother tongue: English.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is something horrific, something that will make nervous persons scream in agony. Continuing the trend from yesterday, I present one of the darkest chapters in the history of Oz, something even terrible than the current Wicked phenomenon: a preview for a Disney Oz movie on The Mickey Mouse Show. I thank HashShem that this project never came to fruition, and so will you if you watch the three video segments. Be scared and share the weirdness.

Aaron

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

‪ב׳ אדר תשס״ז * 20 February 2007: Shrove Tuesday

Greetings.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is “Lost in Oz”, a pilot for a TV show derivative of the 1939 The Wizard of Oz movie made in 2002 with elements of L. Frank Baum’s The Patchwork Girl of Oz in an extremely distorted form. This pilot has some rather unique ideas not found in any of the other off-canon Oz material. Enjoy, share the weirdness, and yes, that really is the oddest interpretation of the Patchwork Girl I have ever heard of.

Aaron

Monday, February 19, 2007

‪א׳ אדר תשס״ז * 19 February 2007: ראש חודש/Presidents’ Day/Carnival Monday

Greetings.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing, submitted by Liz and Barry, is “Charlie the Unicorn”. Note that this is a short film, so those using a dial-up modem (yes, some of us do that, strange as that is) will probably want to view the low-quality version. WARNING: Very silly. Enjoy, share the weirdness, happy new month, and don’t let your friends talk you into going to Candy Mountain.

Aaron

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

‪כ״ה שבט תשס״ז * 13 February 2007: Get a Different Name Day

Greetings.

In celebration of today’s quasi-holiday, today I shall be referred to as “Greflar the Insipid”.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is “Cell Phone Guns”, submitted by Mom. Enjoy and share the weirdness.

Greflar

Monday, February 12, 2007

‪כ״ד שבט תשס״ז * 12 February 2007: Darwin Day/Lincoln’s Birthday

Greetings.

Relevant to one of today’s quasi-holidays: “Darwin Day: A Dialog between Science and Religion”.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is ElvisWanted.com. Enjoy and share the weirdness. And thank you, thank you very much for reading my blog.

Aaron

Friday, February 2, 2007

‪י״ד שבט תשס״ז * 2 February 2007: Frozen Food/Imbolc/Candlemas/Groundhog Day

Greetings.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is the LCARS Standards Development Board. Somebody please tell these people to spend their time and effort creating an LCARS theme for Mac OS X Enjoy, share the weirdness, Shabbath shalom, and happy Tu biShevat.

Aaron

Thursday, February 1, 2007

‪י״ג שבט תשס״ז* 1 February 2007: Robinson Crusoe Day/Imbolc/Candlemas

Greetings.

Today’s news and commentary:Today’s weird thing is something sent to me by someone who wishes to remain anonymous, included below. Enjoy and share the weirdness.

Aaron



If you are Jewish, and grew up in city with a large Jewish population, or are gentile with Jewish friends or associates, the following will invoke heartfelt memories, so read on.........

The Yiddish word for Today is PULKES (PUHL-kees) Translation: THIGHS. Please note: this word has been traced back to the language of one of the original Tribes of Israel, the Cellulites.

The only good advice that your Jewish mother gave you was:"Go! You might meet somebody!"

You grew up thinking it was normal for someone to shout "Are you okay?" through the bathroom door when you were in there longer than 3 minutes.

Your family dog responded to commands in Yiddish.

Every Saturday morning your father went to the neighborhood deli (called an "appetitizing store") for whitefish salad, whitefish "chubs"), lox (nova if you were rich!), herring, corned beef, roast beef, cole slaw, potato salad, a 1/2-dozen huge barrel pickles which you reached into the brine for, a dozen assorted bagels, cream cheese and rye bread (sliced while he waited). All of which would be strictly off-limits until Sunday morning.

Every Sunday afternoon was spent visiting your grandparents and/or other relatives.

You experienced the phenomenon of 50 people fitting into a 10-foot-wide dining room hitting each other with plastic plates trying to get to a deli tray.

You had at least one female relative who penciled on eyebrows which were always asymmetrical.

You thought pasta was stuff used exclusively for Kugel and kasha with bowties.

You were as tall as your grandmother by the age of seven.

You were as tall as your grandfather by age seven and a half.

You never knew anyone whose last name didn't end in one of 5 standard suffixes (berg, baum, man, stein and witz).

You were surprised to discover that wine doesn't always taste like cranberry sauce.

You can look at gefilte fish and not turn green.

When your mother smacked you really hard, she continued to make you feel bad for hurting her hand.

You can understand Yiddish but you can't speak it.

You know how to pronounce numerous Yiddish words and use them correctly in context, yet you don't know exactly what they mean. Kaynahurra.

You're still angry at your parents for not speaking both Yiddish and English to you when you were a baby.

You have at least one ancestor who is somehow related to your spouse's ancestor.

Your grandparents' newly washed linoleum floor was covered with the NY Times, which your grandparents couldn't read.

You thought speaking loud was normal.

You considered your Bar or Bat Mitzvah a "Get Out of Hebrew School Free" card.

You think eating half a jar of dill pickles is a wholesome snack.

You're compelled to mention your grandmother's "steel cannonballs" upon seeing fluffy matzo balls served at restaurants.

You buy 3 shopping bags worth of hot bagels on every trip to NYC and ship them home via FedEx. (Or, if you live near NYC or Philadelphia or another Jewish city hub, you drive 3 hours just to buy a dozen "real"
bagels.)

Your mother or grandmother took personal pride when a Jew was noted for some accomplishment (showbiz, medicine, politics, etc.) and was ashamed and embarrassed when a Jew was accused of a crime .. as if they were relatives.

You thought only non-Jews went to sleep away colleges. Jews went to city schools ... unless they had scholarships or made an Ivy League school.

And finally, you knew that Sunday night and the night after any Jewish holiday was designated for Chinese food.

Zei gezunt!!!