Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Rav Me’ir Bar-’Ilan Street

Jewish date:  9 Siwan 5772 (Parashath Naso’).

Today’s events:  Nothing secular.  (Your humble blogger cannot explain it, but that is what his calendar claims.)


Continuing the series on Giv‘ath Shemu’el, today’s street of interest is Rav Me’ir Bar-’Ilan Street.  As usual, descriptions may be inaccurate for your amusement.

Note:  Bar ’Ilan University is not on this street.  Go figure. 

Note the utter lack of a university.

There is a school on Bar-’Ilan Street, and these pictures seem to be examples of kid art.  I think the use of the opening of a drainage pipe as a ball demonstrates at least as much capability for creative reinterpretation as I display during this series.

More decorative gates with Intefe symbols, these meaning “people” and “If you can read this, thank an interactive teaching program”.

Enjoy and share the weirdness.


Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Shelomoh Ben-Yosef Street

Jewish date:  8 Siwan 5772 (Parashath Naso’).

Today’s event:  End of the Middle Ages Day.


In honor of the end of the Middle Ages (which happened quite some time ago), Barry has asked me to let you know about this:  “Star Turtle needed to tow planet”.  (Apparently the Great A’Tuin is too busy to do the job.  The tortoises here in Giv‘ath Shemu’el are definitely too small.)

Continuing my series on the streets of Giv‘ath Shemu’el, today’s street of interest is Shelomoh Ben-Yosef Street.  As usual, the descriptions may be embellished for the sake of your amusement.

The sign was bent when I found it.  Really.  And I did not photograph the sledgehammer, so you cannot prove anything.

One of our local gnomes.  Gnomes are known to be mischievous enough to deliberately stand such that their shadows fall in places inconvenient for photographers.

“We guard the gates of Hell!”
“Not only do we not guard the gates of Hell, you’re trying to rip off LOLcats!  Idiot.”
“Can’t I have any fun?”
“Shut up and smile for the nice blogger.”

The gnome’s cyborgized monster cages, guarded by the lions and other creatures.  The monsters are invisible, of course.  And before anyone asks, no one was crazy enough to cyborgize monsters.  The monsters are descended from rat-like creatures modified to survive on a Mars-like planet, cyborgized in such a way so that their descendants would be hatched with built-in electronics.  Evolution took over when some escaped, and ten million years or so later they were invisible cyborgized monsters.  The monsters are considered the ultimate pet by certain social circles of Bazes.

More cacti.  Invisible cyborgized monsters use them for appetizers.

One of the local deer, come to browse on the flowers.  Fortunately for it, invisible cyborgized monsters prefer larger prey, such as cows and automobiles.

Disguised Intefe robots.  They explained that they are afraid of the invisible cyborgized monsters and feel confident that they will not try to eat them dressed like this.

That wall is actually a hologram hiding a passageway to deep subterranean cavern filled with invisible cyborgized monsters.

A vicious guard duck, on duty to make sure the invisible cyborgized monsters do not escape.

Pac-Man bait.  It is also useful for baiting invisible monsters.

Enjoy, share the weirdness, and beware of invisible monsters.


Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Dawidh Ben Guryon Street

Jewish date:  1 Siwan 5772 (Parashath BeMidhbar).

Today’s events:  Buy-A-Musical Instrument Day, Emancipation Day (Puerto Rico), International Day for Biological Diversity (UN observance).


Continuing my series on Giv‘ath Shemu’el, today’s street of interest is Dawidh Ben Guryon Street.  As before, descriptions may be deliberately inaccurate for the purpose of entertainment.  So if you come to visit and wonder why the Intefe robots seem to ignore you, that’s why.

Note all the colorful flowers.  Walking through here, I could have sworn I heard little people singing about lollipops.

Every city and town in Israel seems to have a welcoming sign.  This is the one for Giv‘ath Shemu’el.

Even things thrown away over here can be cheerily colorful.

Some of our famous tortoises, the last of which is extremely patriotic.

And our famous giant beetles.

If you look carefully, you can see a camouflaged crocodile on the rock.  Stay away from these, especially if you are carrying gefilte fish, brisket, schnitzel, cholent, or shawarma.  If you are carrying felafel or French fries, you are safe; such crocodiles tend to be very picky about their health and avoid fried foods.

Some of our famous decorated electrical boxes.  In the middle picture one can see an Intefe robot art student as well, trying to explain to me the significance of these works.  Unfortunately, his/her accent is terrible, and I only got the impression that the artist was running low on yellow and red paint.

The most original fence your humble blogger has seen in Giv‘ath Shemu’el.

It is amazing how many Disney characters one can get together at the same time for a convention.

Special bonus:  Barry recommends “The Best Of The Evil Cows Meme”.

Enjoy, share the weirdness, and happy new month.


Monday, May 21, 2012

Ḥayyim Naḥman Bi’aliq Street

Jewish date:  29 ’Iyyar 5772 (Parashath BeMidhbar).

Today’s events:  Free Money Day, Victoria Day, World Day for Cultural Diversity for Dialogue and Development (UN observance with a name too long and boring).


Continuing our series on Giv‘ath Shemu’el, today’s street of interest is Ḥayyim Naḥman Bi’aliq Street. As usual, the descriptions of the pictures may be inaccurate for entertainment purposes and should not be taken too seriously.

Without a question, these are alien plants.

I think I saw one of these on an episode of Doctor Who with plans that included possessing a human, bargaining with space pirates, and stealing a Platonic solid.  These xerophytes denied that had any such intentions, though one of them mumbled something about “those meddling Intefe robots”.

This field is fenced in, because it is filled with vicious carnivorous plants.

These plants are so vicious that they are eating a car carelessly left in the field.

A traffic circle at the intersection of Bi’aliq and Ben Guryon.

The metal gentleman and the metal pigeons are visiting from Oz and enjoying our fine spring weather.  He walked off soon after I took this picture, as people kept annoying him by asking him if was the Tin Woodman.

A monument to the electric razor next to the municipality building

Two Intefe robots hiding in foliage.

Three boxwood trees in front of the municipality building.

An electrical box, probably depicting the ocean.

A passage to Oz.  I regret that I cannot take pictures of Oz, as the passage leads directly through the Deadly Desert, which I do not have the equipment to cross safely.  Anyone wishing to fund the building of a sandboat, please let me know.

More electrical boxes, these painted to depict cypress trees during a Martian sandstorm.

Ṣevarim, which are cactuses kept by Israelis as guard creatures.  They are highly vicious and have been known to eat burglars.

A baby Intefe robot.  They tend to perch on metal or concrete objects.

More weird alien plants.

More painted electrical boxes, with a fence with a wagon-wheel theme in the background.

I think that arch painted on the electrical box is supposed to be a bridge.  The metal gentleman from Oz claims it is a very dusty rainbow.  (Ruggedo reportedly pulled some petty stunts after being rejected by Polychrome.)

A traffic circle where Bi’aliq and HazZethim Street cross.

There used to be a building here, but aliens abducted it.

Intefe robots hiding in the foliage in front of a building.  And, no, the Intefe did not steal that building.

They did not steal the building that was here either.

The traffic circle at the corner of Bi’aliq and Menaḥem Beghin Avenue.

Enjoy, share the weirdness, and beware of building-abducting aliens.