Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Shelomoh Ben-Yosef Street

Jewish date:  8 Siwan 5772 (Parashath Naso’).

Today’s event:  End of the Middle Ages Day.

Greetings.

In honor of the end of the Middle Ages (which happened quite some time ago), Barry has asked me to let you know about this:  “Star Turtle needed to tow planet”.  (Apparently the Great A’Tuin is too busy to do the job.  The tortoises here in Giv‘ath Shemu’el are definitely too small.)

Continuing my series on the streets of Giv‘ath Shemu’el, today’s street of interest is Shelomoh Ben-Yosef Street.  As usual, the descriptions may be embellished for the sake of your amusement.

The sign was bent when I found it.  Really.  And I did not photograph the sledgehammer, so you cannot prove anything.


One of our local gnomes.  Gnomes are known to be mischievous enough to deliberately stand such that their shadows fall in places inconvenient for photographers.

“We guard the gates of Hell!”
“Not only do we not guard the gates of Hell, you’re trying to rip off LOLcats!  Idiot.”
“Can’t I have any fun?”
“Shut up and smile for the nice blogger.”

The gnome’s cyborgized monster cages, guarded by the lions and other creatures.  The monsters are invisible, of course.  And before anyone asks, no one was crazy enough to cyborgize monsters.  The monsters are descended from rat-like creatures modified to survive on a Mars-like planet, cyborgized in such a way so that their descendants would be hatched with built-in electronics.  Evolution took over when some escaped, and ten million years or so later they were invisible cyborgized monsters.  The monsters are considered the ultimate pet by certain social circles of Bazes.

More cacti.  Invisible cyborgized monsters use them for appetizers.

One of the local deer, come to browse on the flowers.  Fortunately for it, invisible cyborgized monsters prefer larger prey, such as cows and automobiles.

Disguised Intefe robots.  They explained that they are afraid of the invisible cyborgized monsters and feel confident that they will not try to eat them dressed like this.

That wall is actually a hologram hiding a passageway to deep subterranean cavern filled with invisible cyborgized monsters.

A vicious guard duck, on duty to make sure the invisible cyborgized monsters do not escape.

Pac-Man bait.  It is also useful for baiting invisible monsters.

Enjoy, share the weirdness, and beware of invisible monsters.

’Aharon/Aaron
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