Friday, June 22, 2012

Unauthorized “guest” post by ◳◳◳: HazZethim Street

Hi, humans!  This is ◳◳◳, troublemaker extraordinaire.  After hacking the Facebook pages of some stupid Intefe robots, Salle and I decided that it would be fun to hack his computer and this blog, too, and present a different POV on the streets of Giv‘ath Shemu’el.  Today we’re going to look at HazZethim (Olive) Street.

And you humans still haven’t figured out how to standardize transliteration yet.

It’s a street, and it’s long.

This is Giv‘ath Shemu’el’s answer to Stonehenge.  Big whoop.

They put it at the mouth of a passage leading to Candyland.  How appropriate.

Been there.  Decimated that.

Salle knocked down part of the “Great Wall of Giv‘ath Shemu’el” soon after this picture was taken.  She loves playing with explosives.  Explosives may be a primitive way to destroy things, but Salle finds them very satisfying.

Stole the statue here.  Sold it as scrap metal.

Stole it.  Framed it.  Put it in my living room.

There’s your olive tree.  The passage leads through the woods to Granny’s house.  Don’t send your pet dogs there.  Granny eats wolves.  Or send the dogs.  ◪◬◘s are much better pets.  They’re so much smarter than dogs.  Or humans.

Yet another decorated traffic circle.  Notice how you humans have still not gotten around to straightening up the topography of this place.  Giv‘ath Shemu’el is sort of bumpy.

A passage leading to another street.  Notice two pairs of Intefe robots having a staring contest.  Boring!

More electrical boxes, these painted with pretty birds.  I put them in Salle’s room.

I killed this thing and stuck it on a pole.  I think it’s from Foovonia.  It tasted a bit odd.

Took the building here.  Still waiting for the Zeelandians to deliver payment for it.

Another traffic circle.  Eh.

A bunch of Intefe robots trying to hitch a ride.

An Intefe robot wondering where her house is.  Like you don’t know already.  Beyond her is a traffic circle at the end of the street.

Took that one, too.

This is that traffic circle at the end of the street.  That weird fruit thing is supposed to be a pomegranate. I think.  I don’t know what that other weird thing is.  Salle and I took it back to our spaceship for further analysis and confusing the Foo.

A view down the street from the traffic circle.

Various riding animals.  They’re good with tartar sauce.

This place is for really big board games.

Another one of those weird things.

A really big detective agency in Israel.

More of the Great Wall with olive trees.  This street was actually named by someone who loved martinis.

Date palms having a bad hair day.  They make nice brooms.

One of those freaky turtles.  They bite if you try to make soup from them.

More of these silly Intefe robots, at least one of which is drunk.

I can’t believe some of you people take forever to take down their menorah after Ḥanukkah.  Or that you can’t just use hovershoes to get to it like normal beings.

A haunted house.  Big fight between ghosts, ninjas, pirates, and penguins.  No big whoop.

So did we learn anything?  Yes:  Aaron needs a stronger password.


PS:  Salle says hi.

PPS:  Don’t forget to go see Adventures in Sandwich-Making, coming to a theater near you soon!  You won’t believe the havoc that can ensue when someone makes a ham and cheese on rye!

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